The Bible of Buzz: Difference between revisions
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Few things in life are better than experiencing the spleen-rattling, impishly malevolent musical spectacle that is a Melvins concert. The Los Angeles-via-Seattle band has been at it for more than two decades, and judging by their amazing new A Senile Animal, they’re only getting better with time. But one thing that comes close is actually chatting with Afrotastic-coiffed Melvins singer/guitarist Buzz Osborne. He tells it like it is, and folks like Henry Rollins and Lewis Black got nothin’ on King Buzzo’s rants. | Few things in life are better than experiencing the spleen-rattling, impishly malevolent musical spectacle that is a Melvins concert. The Los Angeles-via-Seattle band has been at it for more than two decades, and judging by their amazing new A Senile Animal, they’re only getting better with time. But one thing that comes close is actually chatting with Afrotastic-coiffed Melvins singer/guitarist Buzz Osborne. He tells it like it is, and folks like Henry Rollins and Lewis Black got nothin’ on King Buzzo’s rants. | ||
On the numerous Melvins bassists that have come and gone over the years: | <b>On the numerous Melvins bassists that have come and gone over the years:</b> | ||
“I’ve always felt if I’ve got somebody in the band I don’t like, they’re gone. History. Because nothing’s gonna stop me. We’ve been through a lot of bass players, but people should figure that out—why do they think that is? I refuse to deal with people who aren’t on the same level as us. | “I’ve always felt if I’ve got somebody in the band I don’t like, they’re gone. History. Because nothing’s gonna stop me. We’ve been through a lot of bass players, but people should figure that out—why do they think that is? I refuse to deal with people who aren’t on the same level as us. | ||
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“In the case of one of our bass players, I quit worrying what he thought about me. I got to the end of a tour with him and I thought I didn’t wanna play in this band anymore. I thought about breaking this thing up and starting a new band. And then I realized I just really didn’t wanna play with him anymore.” | “In the case of one of our bass players, I quit worrying what he thought about me. I got to the end of a tour with him and I thought I didn’t wanna play in this band anymore. I thought about breaking this thing up and starting a new band. And then I realized I just really didn’t wanna play with him anymore.” | ||
On being a band that’s had to make its living by touring heavily year after year: | <b>On being a band that’s had to make its living by touring heavily year after year:</b> | ||
“It would be far more annoying if I were working at Denny’s. That always blows my mind when bands are like, ‘I can’t handle the pressure of touring anymore.’ Okay, go handle the pressure of working at Kinko’s. They’re a bunch of pussies. Get a straight job and you can be at home all the time, dumbass. They play guitar for a living—what the fuck is the problem? ‘I can’t handle touring anymore. I’m too tired out on the road.’ Go talk to a coal miner in West Virginia, then you’ll talk to someone who’s fuckin’ tired. | “It would be far more annoying if I were working at Denny’s. That always blows my mind when bands are like, ‘I can’t handle the pressure of touring anymore.’ Okay, go handle the pressure of working at Kinko’s. They’re a bunch of pussies. Get a straight job and you can be at home all the time, dumbass. They play guitar for a living—what the fuck is the problem? ‘I can’t handle touring anymore. I’m too tired out on the road.’ Go talk to a coal miner in West Virginia, then you’ll talk to someone who’s fuckin’ tired. | ||
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“The thing about it is, people get stressed out being in a band that tours all the time, but you gotta put things in perspective. It’s not that bad. When I was 14 years old out in the woods loading shake blocks onto the truck … no, no, no, this is better than that. Or when I was takin’ shit from some dumbass boss at a pizza place, fuck that. I don’t think a day went by that I didn’t wanna burn that place down. I don’t have those feelings now.” | “The thing about it is, people get stressed out being in a band that tours all the time, but you gotta put things in perspective. It’s not that bad. When I was 14 years old out in the woods loading shake blocks onto the truck … no, no, no, this is better than that. Or when I was takin’ shit from some dumbass boss at a pizza place, fuck that. I don’t think a day went by that I didn’t wanna burn that place down. I don’t have those feelings now.” | ||
On being credited with launching the Seattle grunge scene: | <b>On being credited with launching the Seattle grunge scene:<b/> | ||
“We didn’t feel like we were a part of anything there. But we were very much in our infancy at that point. Just getting shows was impossible. | “We didn’t feel like we were a part of anything there. But we were very much in our infancy at that point. Just getting shows was impossible. | ||
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“We played some shows I’ll never forget, like we opened for the Minutemen. And there were bands like the U-Men that I liked a lot, and Malfunkshun. Then we became friends with the guys in Green River. We drifted apart from that stuff a long time ago, pretty much when half of that band became multimillionaires. [Members of Green River went on to form Pearl Jam.] Surprisingly enough, when people become multimillionaires, I’m no longer on their A-list. It’s happened dozens of times. Oh well, it really breaks my heart.” | “We played some shows I’ll never forget, like we opened for the Minutemen. And there were bands like the U-Men that I liked a lot, and Malfunkshun. Then we became friends with the guys in Green River. We drifted apart from that stuff a long time ago, pretty much when half of that band became multimillionaires. [Members of Green River went on to form Pearl Jam.] Surprisingly enough, when people become multimillionaires, I’m no longer on their A-list. It’s happened dozens of times. Oh well, it really breaks my heart.” | ||
On being considered “weird” or a “willfully difficult” band: | <b>On being considered “weird” or a “willfully difficult” band:</b> | ||
“A lot of people are intimidated by the way I look just because I don’t have a Johnny Unitas haircut or something, but that’s fairly typical for lots of people. We have this long history, and lots of people are definitely weirded out by us. It’s not that big of a deal, though. | “A lot of people are intimidated by the way I look just because I don’t have a Johnny Unitas haircut or something, but that’s fairly typical for lots of people. We have this long history, and lots of people are definitely weirded out by us. It’s not that big of a deal, though. | ||
Revision as of 13:04, 11 October 2006
Let these tasty nuggets of Melvins wisdom nourish your body, mind and spirit.
by Michael Alan Goldberg http://www.philadelphiaweekly.com/view.php?id=13167
Few things in life are better than experiencing the spleen-rattling, impishly malevolent musical spectacle that is a Melvins concert. The Los Angeles-via-Seattle band has been at it for more than two decades, and judging by their amazing new A Senile Animal, they’re only getting better with time. But one thing that comes close is actually chatting with Afrotastic-coiffed Melvins singer/guitarist Buzz Osborne. He tells it like it is, and folks like Henry Rollins and Lewis Black got nothin’ on King Buzzo’s rants.
On the numerous Melvins bassists that have come and gone over the years:
“I’ve always felt if I’ve got somebody in the band I don’t like, they’re gone. History. Because nothing’s gonna stop me. We’ve been through a lot of bass players, but people should figure that out—why do they think that is? I refuse to deal with people who aren’t on the same level as us.
“I think of bands that are having troubles, it blows my mind. Why don’t they just kick that person out? ‘You don’t wanna work? We’ll make it real easy for you—you’re fired!’ I guess bands are afraid, ‘Oh, our fans won’t accept it’ or something, I dunno. I don’t have time for fuckin’ bullshit, no way.
“We’ve never had anybody quit our band—we’ve always fired them. I’m always the asshole. They tend to get along with [drummer Dale] Crover, but they hate me. I don’t care—cry me a river.
“In the case of one of our bass players, I quit worrying what he thought about me. I got to the end of a tour with him and I thought I didn’t wanna play in this band anymore. I thought about breaking this thing up and starting a new band. And then I realized I just really didn’t wanna play with him anymore.”
On being a band that’s had to make its living by touring heavily year after year:
“It would be far more annoying if I were working at Denny’s. That always blows my mind when bands are like, ‘I can’t handle the pressure of touring anymore.’ Okay, go handle the pressure of working at Kinko’s. They’re a bunch of pussies. Get a straight job and you can be at home all the time, dumbass. They play guitar for a living—what the fuck is the problem? ‘I can’t handle touring anymore. I’m too tired out on the road.’ Go talk to a coal miner in West Virginia, then you’ll talk to someone who’s fuckin’ tired.
“The thing about it is, people get stressed out being in a band that tours all the time, but you gotta put things in perspective. It’s not that bad. When I was 14 years old out in the woods loading shake blocks onto the truck … no, no, no, this is better than that. Or when I was takin’ shit from some dumbass boss at a pizza place, fuck that. I don’t think a day went by that I didn’t wanna burn that place down. I don’t have those feelings now.”
On being credited with launching the Seattle grunge scene:
“We didn’t feel like we were a part of anything there. But we were very much in our infancy at that point. Just getting shows was impossible.
“We played some shows I’ll never forget, like we opened for the Minutemen. And there were bands like the U-Men that I liked a lot, and Malfunkshun. Then we became friends with the guys in Green River. We drifted apart from that stuff a long time ago, pretty much when half of that band became multimillionaires. [Members of Green River went on to form Pearl Jam.] Surprisingly enough, when people become multimillionaires, I’m no longer on their A-list. It’s happened dozens of times. Oh well, it really breaks my heart.”
On being considered “weird” or a “willfully difficult” band:
“A lot of people are intimidated by the way I look just because I don’t have a Johnny Unitas haircut or something, but that’s fairly typical for lots of people. We have this long history, and lots of people are definitely weirded out by us. It’s not that big of a deal, though.
“Do people never listen to weird music anymore? Perhaps people are just sick and stupid. Maybe they don’t believe that after 20 fucking years we don’t know what we’re doing and some 18-year-old does. Who knows? Maybe that’s true.
“I’ve never made a record I thought would piss someone off, that I wanna rip someone off with. Everything we’ve done I think is great. There’s so much shit music out there that if you’ve got the time or energy to think something we’ve done is dumb or somehow we’re the enemy, then I hope and pray you’ll then shower me with whatever rich musical taste you have, because I would love to hear it.”
Melvins Wed., Oct. 18, 8pm. $16-$18. With Big Business. Theater of Living Arts, 334 South St. 215.922.1011. www.theateroflivingarts.net
Return to Melvins Articles 2006